Daily Archives: January 20, 2009

January 20, 2009: The better angels of our nature

our better angelsChange has come to the White House.  Among the signs: the new White House blog, which affirms the commitment of the Obama administration to three core principles: communication, transparency, and participation.

Among its first posts was this one, proclaiming a National Day of Renewal and Reconciliation:

We are in the midst of a season of trial. Our Nation is being tested, and our people know great uncertainty. Yet the story of America is one of renewal in the face of adversity, reconciliation in a time of discord, and we know that there is a purpose for everything under heaven.

On this Inauguration Day, we are reminded that we are heirs to over two centuries of American democracy, and that this legacy is not simply a birthright — it is a glorious burden. Now it falls to us to come together as a people to carry it forward once more.

So in the words of President Abraham Lincoln, let us remember that: “The mystic chords of memory, stretching from every battlefield and patriot grave to every living heart and hearthstone all over this broad land, will yet swell the chorus of the Union, when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature.”

It is enough to move even an atheist like me to say, “Amen.”

No soap, radio: confronting our fear of asking questions

No soap, radioThose of you who grew up in the U.S. may be familiar with “no soap, radio“, a prankster’s joke.  When I was a kid, it was the kind of gag that older kids would pull on younger ones. The prankster and her accomplices — a group of sixth graders for example — would approach their mark — a younger sibling in the fourth or fifth grade perhaps — and offer to regale him with the funniest joke ever.

In the version popular in my hometown, the joke went something like this:  “Two elephants sitting in a tub were taking a bath together. One elephant says, ‘Hey, pal, pass the soap.’ The other elephant replies, ‘No soap, radio!’”

On cue, the prankster and her accomplices begin to laugh uproariously.  The younger kid surreptitiously glances at them, not sure why his older sibling and her friends are laughing.  Puzzled and uneasy, but not wanting to appear unworldly (meanwhile wondering anxiously whether ‘radio’ might be some kind of sexual slang), the younger kid begins to laugh, too, hesitantly, then with more conviction.  The prankster and her friends suddenly stop laughing, and maliciously one asks, “Hey, kid, what’s so funny?”  The younger kid stops, sensing too late the undercurrent of cruelty.  The air is charged with it, as a shameful silence hangs.  The older kids explode with laughter again, and in triumph the prankster shouts out the real punchline, “If it’s so funny, then explain it to me!”

Like a home-grown version of the experiments in social conformity conducted by Solomon Asch in the 1950s, it’s a prank that exploits a strong fear and an equally fierce desire: our fear of looking stupid, and our desire to belong.  Unfortunately, when you don’t ask, the joke’s on you.

It takes courage to admit when we don’t know something, and courage as well to ask.  As the proverb says, “The one who asks questions doesn’t lose his way” — or, for that matter, look like an idiot on the playground. It’s a grade school lesson that all of us should heed.

(Photo credit: Emiliano Spada.)

Mediation Train the Trainer Institute held in Boston Feb. 26-27, 2009

Mediation Train the Trainer Institute BostonIf you’re an experienced mediator who wants to master the essentials of effective mediation training, please join me in Boston for the Mediation Works Incorporated Train the Trainer Institute, on Thursday, February 26 and Friday, February 27, 2009.

I’ll be teaming up with mediator, trainer, and ombuds Charles Doran, MWI’s executive director. This program covers:

  • Program Design and Marketing – How to define and meet the needs of participants; staying focused on goals and outcomes; the logistics of putting on a successful training; programmatic and administrative issues; internal and external program promotion; translating experience into basic concepts that trainees can internalize and practice; delegating pre- and post-training responsibilities within the training team; designing and analyzing diagnostic forms.
  • Delivery - Presenting concepts with impact; selecting and using different delivery media; how to be a facilitator, leader, coordinator (all at the same time); setting up the room; facilitating skill-building exercises; fostering group participation and self-reflection; coaching role-plays and providing feedback to trainees; dealing with difficult participants.
  • Evaluation and Follow-up – Designing effective feedback and evaluation methodologies; delivering feedback to participants during and after the program; incorporating lessons learned into future programs; and more.

The highly interactive, hands-on program will be held at the historic Union Club on Boston’s Beacon Hill, at 8 Park Street.

Registration and more information is available at the MWI web site. I hope to see you there.