Monthly Archives: July 2008

Online articles, web sites for mediators and mediation training graduates

Posted on July 29, 2008 | 1 Comment

Connect to mediation resources with Mediation ChannelI just finished teaching a mediation training program for a group of extraordinary people from a wide range of professional and personal backgrounds. It was a delight to work with smart, insightful, good-humored men and women who demonstrated so much intellectual curiosity and a passion for learning.

I promised to pull together for them a selection of must-read articles for mediators — hence this post. I am also including links to suggested sites. I’m breaking it all down into three sections: Read, Learn, and Connect.

Read

In this section are articles tackling important questions about the practice of mediation. These articles have served as the focus of discussion here in the blogosphere and in the real world.

Learn

What follows are links to resources for new and experienced mediators to continue to develop the capacity to mediate well.

Connect

The following links connect you to bleeding-edge ideas and online conversations about mediation, negotiation, and ADR, or to opportunities to participate in professional associations for ADR practitioners.

  • World Directory of ADR Blogs @ ADRblogs.com. My ongoing effort to track and catalog blogs world-wide that discuss ADR, conflict resolution, negotiation, and innovations in the practice of law and the delivery of justice. All across the globe mediators are wrestling with the issues that face a still-developing field. A random sampling of English language blogs include Brains on Purpose, exploring the intersection between brain sciences and conflict resolution; Settle It Now, a fresh new look at negotiation and ADR from the perspective of a former litigator and experienced commercial mediator; Mediator Tech, dedicated to making technology accessible for even tech-challenged mediators; Mediator Blah…Blah, a self-described “overly opinionated mediation resource” from New Zealand; and ICT for Peacebuilding, a Sri Lankan blog exploring the intersection between technology and conflict resolution while examining ethnopolitical conflict and its transformation.
  • American Bar Association Section on Dispute Resolution. Providing leadership in ADR to advance the field and promote public confidence. The Section is open to anyone committed to dispute resolution — it’s not just for attorneys by any means. It has established a committee on mediator ethical guidance where practitioners can submit questions to the experts, and is responsible for the development of ABA Model Standards of Conduct for Mediators (PDF). The Section famously set the record straight that the practice of mediation is open to all regardless of profession of origin in its February 2002 Resolution on Mediation and the Unauthorized Practice of Law (PDF).
  • MassUMA Working Group web site . For mediators and others interested in taking part in an ongoing conversation about enacting the Uniform Mediation Act in Massachusetts. A chance to participate in making mediation history.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Interested in still more resources and recommended reading, both on the web and in print, relating to mediation? Then read “Print and online resources for mediation and negotiation“, an article I posted a few months ago.

Meanwhile, here’s wishing the very best of luck to this group of new mediators!

→ 1 Comment

Posted in Cool Stuff on the Web, Mediation, Mediation Link Round Up, Online Publications and Articles on ADR

Mediator Victoria Pynchon hosts Blawg Review for first time on IP ADR Blog

Posted on July 29, 2008 | Leave a comment

Mediator loses her cherry hosting Blawg Review for first timeThey say you never forget your first time.

And something tells me that Victoria Pynchon, mediator and author of the negotiation blog Settle It Now, will leave us all with plenty to remember as she plays first-time host to Blawg Review this coming Monday at her second home, IP ADR Blog.

Blawg Review, for those of you not familiar with it, is a weekly review of the best in legal blogging hosted each week by a different blogger, who each present a unique perspective on law, legal issues, and legal scholarship — topics which affect mediators, too.

Want to know the identities of the other Blawg Review virgins? The anonymous editor of Blawg Review kisses and tells. Meanwhile, let’s all see what we can do to make Vickie’s first time really special — visit IP ADR Blog on Monday, August 4, and, if you’re a blogger, give her some link love.

[Update: Blawg Review #171, the Virgin Edition, is now up at IP ADR Blog. It is indeed as memorable as one could wish a first time to be.]

(Photo credit: Camila Schnaibel.)

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Blawg Review, Blogs and Bloggers

Whatever happened to thank you? Thoughts on gratitude

Posted on July 24, 2008 | 10 Comments

Thank you costs so little, means so muchSeveral months ago, a former student of mine, about to sit for the bar, asked me to write for him the letter of recommendation his application package required. Although at that time my schedule was hectic, I was happy to do so and accommodated his request, completing the letter and mailing it off to him well in advance of the bar deadline. I emailed him to let him know it was on its way.

Several weeks passed, and I heard nothing at all from my former student — not an email or phone call to let me know he’d received my letter. I grew concerned that the letter had gone astray and he had failed to receive it. Then, as the days passed, I became annoyed that he hadn’t acknowledged an effort undertaken on his behalf and at his request. At last I emailed him to ask if the letter had reached him. Yes, he wrote back, it came. And then, as an afterthought, he added, by the way, thanks.

His casual response disappointed me. I had taken time to reflect on my personal knowledge of him and his character and then draft with care a letter to help him achieve an important professional goal. Yet it never occurred to him to contact me to reassure me that my letter reached its destination and that he appreciated my help.

Expressing appreciation requires little effort yet means so much to the recipient. You can pick up the phone, send an email, even write a note. Yet failure to do so results in great cost. It saddens me that my former student has unthinkingly burned a bridge. It is unlikely now that I will ever send a client or business opportunity his way.

His carelessness made me think a lot about what “thank you” really means. It is not simply expressing gratitude for the extra mile, the care, the thought. “Thank you” is also about renewing or building relationships. “Thank you” honors a past deed. “Thank you” affirms hope for the future.

If someone gave you advice you asked for, put you in touch with people who could help you, referred you business, linked to your web site, made available resources so you could get something done, or otherwise did you a good deed, thank them. Although some (like gratitude’s fiercest champions, attorneys Dan Hull and Holden Oliver) would suggest a hand-written note (preferably on Crane’s stationery), others like me would say the message itself matters more than the medium in which it is delivered.

Just say it. Right now.

→ 10 Comments

Posted in Dispute Resolution and Your Business, Random Musings

A kinder, gentler lawyer: CuttingEdgeLaw.com shows the sensitive side of the practice of law

Posted on July 23, 2008 | 1 Comment

Cuttingedgelaw.comSomeone called me the other day to ask me to recommend them a lawyer. After describing to me the issues at stake, they said, “I want a real pitbull — someone who’ll go straight for the jugular and show no mercy.”

Believe me, a pitbull was not what this particular case warranted. It’s too bad that so many people think that’s what they need in a lawyer. Not a principled defender of justice, nor a skilled negotiator who can broker a winning deal, nor a charismatic leader who can influence others. Thanks to the media, which rarely depict this side of lawyering, most people fail to see, let alone celebrate, the art in the lawyer’s craft.

J. Kim Wright, who describes herself as a “pioneer, catalyst and leader in a new paradigm of law”, has launched CuttingEdgeLaw.com, an online community and magazine that seeks to show lawyers in a very different light:

Rather than focusing on the latest litigation victories and defeats, we will focus on the roles of lawyers as healers, peacemakers, problem-solvers, and champions for justice. We aren’t looking for the “Super Lawyers” who made $6MM on moving money between two behemoth corporations over a technicality but rather the lawyer who healed a conflict between two parents in a custody dispute or a lawyer who helped a murderer come face to face with the family of his victim and give them the gift of a sincere apology. We’re here to support the explorations and promote the most workable and inspiring options for the legal system. Imagine the legal system as a resource for creating whole, vibrant, loving communities? If we transform our practices, how do we reach clients? How do we earn a living on healing and peace-making when the world is used to viewing lawyers as a polarizing force?

CuttingEdgeLaw.com is still under construction, so not all links on the site are operational. In the meantime, however, you can view video interviews with lawyers who are themselves leaders in the “new paradigm of law”.

A big hat tip to Stephanie West Allen for alerting readers to the launch of this site and Wright’s work.

→ 1 Comment

Posted in Innovations in the Practice of Law, The Future of ADR and Law

Blawg Review #169 discusses branding: why shout when you can whisper?

Posted on July 23, 2008 | 3 Comments

Take charge of the conversation with your brandSince 2005 I’ve been a devoted supporter of Blawg Review, the weekly review of the best in legal blogging. It isn’t just for lawyers — the ideas, analyses of news, and viewpoints you’ll find there are relevant to anyone who seeks intelligent conversation about legal issues or smart tips on the business of running a practice — law or ADR.

Blawg Review #169, this week’s edition, continues the Blawg Review tradition. Playing host is Whisper, a brand strategy consulting firm.

What is branding? Whisper captures it neatly:

Defining why you are, so that you become the only logical choice for what you offer.

Whisper’s approach to brand strategy is simple:

Whisper is founded on one big idea: “The key to any effective marketing, branding or advertising effort is to change and take ownership of the conversation.”

Helping people shape and take ownership of the conversation is something we mediators know plenty about. But branding our work and branding ourselves? — not so much, as my colleague Tammy Lenski has pointed out. Whisper, however, has a lot to teach us. Blawg Review #169 presents examples of effective branding and shares Whisper’s philosophy of strategic brand building.

You can still catch last week’s presentation of Blawg Review, when West Virginia Business Litigation served as host. Next Monday New York criminal defense blog Simple Justice will do the honors.

→ 3 Comments

Posted in Blawg Review, Tech and Business Tips for Mediators

Facing ourselves: new tests for hidden biases at Project Implicit

Posted on July 21, 2008 | Leave a comment

Facing ourselves: testing for hidden biasesThis is by no means the first time I’ve encouraged readers to plumb the depths of their hidden biases with the help of Project Implicit and its Implicit Association Test (IAT), an instrument which “measures implicit attitudes and beliefs that people are either unwilling or unable to report.” With the recent discussion here and elsewhere of gender bias, I thought it was time to revisit the IAT.

The IAT tests for biases across a range of categories, from gender to skin tone to disability. Since I first wrote about it, Project Implicit has introduced other tests, including

  • the “Weapons – Harmless Objects” IAT, which requires the ability to recognize White and Black faces, and images of weapons or harmless objects;
  • the “Arab Muslim – Other People” IAT, which requires the ability to distinguish names that are likely to belong to Arab-Muslims versus people of other nationalities or religions; and
  • a “2008 Presidential Election” IAT, which requires the ability to recognize images of U.S. presidential candidates John McCain and Barack Obama.

You can also take the Three Countries IAT (link good at the time of this post), which requires participants to identify words associated with China, India, and Japan.

Visit Project Implicit and get to know yourself better.

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Cool Stuff on the Web, Gender Matters, Global and Cultural Awareness, Popular Culture, Politics, Society

Don't forget to dance

Posted on July 18, 2008 | 2 Comments

I’m probably one of the last people on earth with an internet connection to see the following video.

That means that it may not be news to you at all. But this video of a guy doing a goofy dance in locations around the world, often attracting crowds of people who join in the fun, put a big smile on my face just in time for the weekend. There’s a story behind it of course.

When was the last time you felt that kind of unalloyed and unselfconscious joy?

Now crank up the volume, get off that task chair, and dance:

→ 2 Comments

Posted in Cool Stuff on the Web

Test your moral DNA online

Posted on July 18, 2008 | Leave a comment

Angel? Or devil? Test your moral DNAWant to know what you’re really made of — ethically speaking, that is? The Times Online links to an online test that identifies your moral DNA.

This test ranks in order of preference the three moral philosophies that guide your ethical decision making: principled conscience, social conscience and rules compliance. Your test results reveal your ethical nature — enforcer, philosopher, judge, angel, teacher, or guardian.

Personally I have skepticism aplenty about a test that purports to plumb my moral depths, particularly when the outcome rests on a mere handful of responses. According to my test results, I am an angel — which any of my closest friends will assure you I am not. ;)

For a more scholarly sojourn into the realm of human moral judgment, visit the Moral Sense Test, which I blogged about three years ago. The MST is part of a research study sponsored by the Primate Cognitive Neuroscience Laboratory at Harvard.

(Hat tip to Thinking Ethics.)

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Cool Stuff on the Web, Online Games, Tools & Tests

Where are women who mediate, part 2: how can you hold a panel discussion on diversity and forget to include women?

Posted on July 18, 2008 | 5 Comments

Women still invisible - even at diversity workshopsLast week fellow mediator, blogger and rabble-rouser Victoria Pynchon published a post with a confrontational title: “Dispute Resolution by Old White Men: Gender Prejudice Sinks Arbitration Award“.

Lobbed like a Molotov cocktail, Vickie’s post blew gender bias apart, as she recited a litany of examples of discrimination spanning decades against women inside and outside the legal profession.

It’s not just the persistence of gender bias that makes women like Vickie and me so damn mad. It is also its effect: it makes us invisible — so much so that it drove me to ask out loud several weeks ago, “Where are all the women who mediate?“, as I looked at an ad for a panel of 15 neutrals that included only one woman.

Now I’m asking a different question. A colleague just sent me a flyer for a workshop on diversity and conflict resolution to be held here in New England.

First the good news: the workshop leaders, all nationally prominent figures in the ADR and legal fields, are of different races and faiths.

Now the bad news: they’re all men.

So I gotta ask: how can you conduct a workshop on diversity without including at least one woman on your panel of speakers?

Well?

→ 5 Comments

Posted in Gender Matters, Popular Culture, Politics, Society, Random Musings

Accessorizing for your next negotiation: should appearance matter?

Posted on July 17, 2008 | 3 Comments

Looks matter for your next negotiationA Google Alert in this morning’s email directed my attention to an article titled, “Isn’t Your Look Part of Your Negotiation?“, posted on WomenandBiz.com, an online magazine “written for today’s entrepreneurial woman”.

The article emphasizes the importance of preparation to effective negotiation — namely, making the right impression with your appearance:

Here are some tips: mimic their style, put yourself in an attractive light and don’t create distractions. What does mimic their style mean? It doesn’t mean be who you are not, but rather present yourself in such a way that will look good to the other party… Mimic their look means to create a look for yourself that will be most pleasing for them to receive you.

Now here’s my favorite part, which the article offers up with a straight face and not even the faintest whiff of irony:

Negotiations are all about getting the other party to listen to you. Your hair, your clothing and your accessories should all be in tune to the tastes of the other party.

(Emphasis added.)

Huh? My accessories? Are you serious? (Incidentally, as my readers know, negotiations are indeed all about listening, but not “all about getting the other party to listen to you”. It’s in fact a lot about listening to them — vital to the relationship building that successful negotiations depend upon. Plus you’ll learn a great deal and be able to leverage the information you acquire.)

How about emphasizing the importance of a professional appearance? In his book Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion, Robert Cialdini describes how powerful authority is as a tool of persuasion and how readily we submit to those who wield it, often unable to distinguish between real and apparent authority. He points out that one of the most recognizable emblems of power here in the West is “the well-tailored business suit”, which “can evoke a telling form of deference from total strangers”, as experiments have shown.

Well-tailored suits aside, I confess I am left uneasy by all this talk about a negotiating woman’s appearance. Behind it lurks a whole array of social justice issues uncomfortable to discuss but urgent for us to face — women and aging, youth and beauty, race and skin color, antipathy toward the obese, prejudice against those with disabilities or deformities.

In urging women to “mimic” the look of their bargaining counterpart, how would the author of this article counsel the 60-year-old woman negotiating with her 30-year-old prospective boss? Or a woman of color negotiating in a predominately white workplace? Or a woman wearing a hijab? Or a woman with a face disfigured in a car crash, negotiating with people who are unscarred and whole?

There’s much, much more here than meets the eye.

→ 3 Comments

Posted in Gender Matters, Mind and Cognition, Negotiation and Settlement, Popular Culture, Politics, Society